A Date That Will Live in Infamy

[December 7th, 1941. The order is given. TORA! TORA! TORA!]

[10 minutes later, the Japanese invasion force lays strewn about the waters of Oahu Island. The American forces at Pearl Harbor cheer as the large aircraft ascends back into the skies over Hawaii and disappears into the clouds.]

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[December 7th, 43 BC. In the yard of Roman Senator Marcus Tullius Cicero, the words are spoken. "There is nothing proper about what you are doing, soldier, but do try to kill me properly." Suddenly, a large arm extends and prepares to strike....and immediately falls limp. Howls of pain and blood smear the area. Cicero opens his eyes to find he is not dead as he'd thought only a moment before. His proported assassins lay, in pieces, around him. Behind him, a flash of light; as he turns, he sees nothing. Cicero's slaves attend to him, gladdened that their master is very much alive.]

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[December 7th, 1869. Outside a bank, a gunman fires and makes his escape. There is a commotion as he reaches his horse, but before he can make his great escape, he is rudely interuppted by a sword piercing his heart. The sheriff and his deputies attend to the corpse and collect the stolen money, looking out around the Missouri horizon for whomever could've laid this robber, a one Jesse Woodson James, low.]

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[December 7th, 1787. As the Delaware legislature prepares to vote on ratifcation of the United States Constitution, making them the first state to do so, Governor Thomas Collins enters the chambers with a series of explosive devices attached to his abdomen. He yells something in what sounds like Farsi and clicks a trigger device in his left hand. The building is destroyed. There are no survivors.]

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[December 7th, 1987. Singer and actor Aaron Carter is born. A few minutes later, the hospital is consumed by a hideous gas explosion. There are no survivors.]

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[December 7th, 2011. Actor Harry Morgan, best known from his roles on M*A*S*H and Dragnet, passes away at the age of 96. Then, roughly 4 minutes later, comes back to life. He lives another 34 years, happily and without ill health or incident.]

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[Within the confines of the Space-Time Continuum...]

Cosmos: Did you succeed?!
Chronos: Is it done?!
Herve: Did it work?!
Piett [standing triumphantly]: It sure as hell did. [pulls out...] Madden NFL 13, motherfuckers.
Cosmos, Chronos and Herve: YEEEAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Piett: And only 8 months early.
Herve: It doesn't hurt to screw with time for something like this, does it?
Cosmos: Probably.
Piett: Really??
Chronos: Yeah. But who gives a shit about that crap. We'll fix it tomorrow.

*fin*