Herve: So you're saying this place isn't what it appears to be?
Piett: Yup. History says that Washington's body couldn't be reinterred here when it was finally built, but as you're about to witness, truth says....something different.
[Piett and Herve reach a marble compass in the middle of the room; geographically, it is the exact point where the 4 quadrants of the District of Columbia meet. Piett grabs the compass and, in what looks like a herculean feat of strength, begins to twist and turn the dials around.]
Herve: Jesus, that Shake Weight shit works miracles!
Piett: It's paper mache. Lightweight as hell.
Herve: Really? [looks around] Well, then these Do Not Touch signs work miracles!
[The dials suddenly stop moving and a loud series of clicks, whirs and grinding eminate from underground. They move only slightly at the sounds, all around them, echo throughout the empty corridors of the crypt. Then, with a furious vigor, over 30 devices loudly break through the stone floor and emerge into sight. Each device is labelled with a name, and Herve's eyes widen as he identifies many of them, and points at one in particular.]
Herve: Holy Magna Carta, Piett! It's.....these are....that's...!!
Piett: Toldja the truth says something different, Herve. It says that George Washington is very much here and has been for a long time.....and so is every single other dead president.
Herve: So.....we're doing this? Really doing this?!
Piett: Indeed. It's time to resurrect....
[Long dramatic pause!]
Piett: ....the weird ones.
[Pause]
Herve: Wait, what?!
...to be continued...
No comments:
Post a Comment